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| Internuggets of fun |
| Roy Starin |
Godfuckingshitassdammit!!!!! I just got finished typing out the intro to this fucking column, and I went and clicked on something else, and the whole fucking thing disappeared. Has that ever happened to you? Of course not, because you aren't a damn idiot. FUCK!!!
(deep breath)Okay, let's try this again. So, yeah, I spend a whole lotta time surfing the intartubes in the hopes that I will unlock some sort of secret society of ultra cool web content, or maybe even discover the Matrix or something. Think about how much the average Joe watches TV; that's about how much time I waste looking for videos, songs to download, and other randomness. That doesn't even include porn time, which falls into a whole 'nother category.
In my virtual travels, I pick up little trinkets of awesomeness. I would like to share some of this awesomeness with you today. I wrote something in the old intro about how You Tube is the new opiate of the masses, and I liked the way it sounded, so I am gonna crowbar that sentence into this paragraph. I was similarly clever about something else, but I forgot that part. The following links are all somewhat music related, so this column still qualifies under statute 8675309 in the federal Music Writers' Code as a bonafide music column. But other than that, it's really just a bunch of links that I think are cool. ( Random side note: Chuck Klosterman wrote a kick ass article in the new Esquire, you should check it out. Yes, Esquire magazine. I wish I could write like Chuck Klosterman.)
The Clash is one of my all time favorite bands. The energy they brought to a live performance is the stuff of legend. Need proof?
White Riot
Figured that I would start out with a banger. Imagine being in that crowd, witnessing rock and roll greatness. You know, one of you crusts probably was in that crowd. Nevermind. There's one more band I never got the opportunity to see live, and that's the Dead Kennedys. Looks like it was a good time.
Police Truck
And that will just about do it for the punk rock portion of this column. Those of you with more hardcore sensibilities may wanna stop clicking on links from here on out. The rest of you may find this stuff funny or lame or both. Let's start with something weird.
Now some of you may say, what the hell does the following have to do with music? I say that jingles are part of popular musical culture, like it or not. Imagine seeing this commercial while sitting stoned on the couch. Comedy gold.
Moo and Oink
Now let's get away from You Tube for a minute. Music blogs are great for finding new music. They also have some interesting columns, like "The 25 most exquisitely sad songs of all time". Lists like that are guaranteed to cause debate amongst music nerds (we love lists), thus generating more traffic to your blog. Anyway, here's my favorite from that list. The Smiths cornered the market on depression for a little while in the eighties, and I think this song, played at the right time in one's life may actually cause death by spontaneous combustion or wrist slittiness or something.
I know it's over
Fuck yeah, that rules. Done crying yet, emo boy? Let's see, what's next? Oh yeah. So you know that song "My Humps" by that man-lady Fergie? I will spare you the link to that song, but I will subject you to the Alanis Morrissette parody of the song in question only so I can share the parody of her parody. You follow all that? Alright, here's the Alanis parody in all its unfunnyness.
Seriously, not that funny
But wait, a witty retort from none other than Peaches. Poo=funny, there is no truer statement.
Her Dumps
Still with me? I know the last two may have been tough, so I will reward you with a little Reverend X. What you know 'bout God, muthafucka?
Here I go
Gotta love that. I will close with something a little more serious, but no less strange. One of my music professors started out our history of music class with a question. "What is art?" Have you ever seriously tried to answer that? We spent hours trying to define art, only to find that there was nothing we could come up with that would stick. We then took the reverse approach, trying to define art by what it wasn't. That brings me to my next video. John Cage pushed the boundaries of music by exploring what could be defined "music". The results usually ended up sounding something like this:
Water Walk
Think about that the next time you dismiss something as "not music". Well, that's all I got for you for now, feel free to share your internuggets with me on the message boards. 'Til next time..
send me stuff!
rstarin74@yahoo.com
Roy Starin
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Sunday 20th 2007f May 2007 09:00
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