-- If you ask most people to run down a list of their favorite skaters of all time, 9 times out of 10, Jeff Grosso will be on that list, and usually near the top of it. To a skateboarder, the reasons for this are obvious. One of Jeff's tricks is worth at least three of anyone else's. So much Power, so much style, his skating is truly in a class of it's own. A beautiful and raw thing to witness, a true show of greatness. But to an outsider, a non-skateboarder, Jeff might not even rate as a "decent" human being. Why not? Well Jeff didn't have the fabled and illustrious competitive pro career, with dozens of contest wins. He turned pro when it all went to shit. He didn't become a poster child for milk� or become a marketable commodity that could be paraded on television for the sake of selling products. Jeff didn't become a household name synonymous with video games, cheap chinese made toys, or extreme sports stage shows. Instead Jeff floored it, down what some might consider to be the highway to hell. This is a recurring concept that we have seen repeatedly throughout history in the lives of the gifted, the brilliant, and the talented. "Fuck it. Fuck it all." And in the last year or so, when Grosso was getting some coverage and interviews, it seemed as though a large part of those features' focus was his ride down that so-called highway. Since he isn't afraid to tell anybody anything, most of us are already familiar with the basic story line. Why dwell on the same old shit?
I've been fortunate enough to witness Jeff's skating in brief installments, from early on, right up until the present. Lopes' ramp, Mile-high, Whittier, Del Mar, Kennedy Warehouse, and on and on. The one characteristic that has always struck me about his riding is how such a big powerful guy can put such finesse to a trick. I have often imagined video footage of his runs in which a giant exclamation point would flash on the screen after each trick. It just seemed somehow appropriate, because everything he does is carried out with authority. That's the thing with Grosso, he tells the absolute truth through it all. In an era where we could all use a lot more truth, in times where the bullshit is piled higher than the drop-in for the mega-ramp, we should all be very grateful that he is here. His skateboarding is among the purest truths ever told, along with his words.
--BLKPRJKT
We often cite Cab as having one of the most picture-perfect FS inverts, but for raw power, hang time and style, nobody comes close to Grosso.
That goon Roskoppp used to have a pretty respectable sadplant, but Jeff's were always more stalled and he's still got them. Fuck mountain bikes.
CD: What is the worst music?
GROSSO: I am not a big fan of rap, but I'm old, and fat too... and I'm white.
CD: What would your dream job be if you weren't a pro skateboarder?
GROSSO: My dream job? I'd like to be involved in the narcotics field. A DEA agent so I could become corrupt!
CD: What are you favorite TV shows right now?
GROSSO: I'm a big fan of Californication. I like all the showtime shows, they are really good. My wife and I like to watch Intervention, we think that is really funny.
Fuck, that dude Ross Vergeno rips!
Encinitas, you figure it out. '05.
CD: Does your wife watch porn with you?
GROSSO: Not recently... (laughing)
CD: Has she seen see your part in Pete Coronas film?
GROSSO: I don't believe she has seen Play Time. She has seen the Matty video but she hasn't seen Play Time. The Matty video sucks but Play Time is brilliant. It was a student project and I was supposed to play a broken hearted guy who was flashing back on the good old days of this relationship with this woman. There's a girl dancing in the forest and us drinking wine together and all this stuff. Its like a two minute long film and he won an award for it. And then at the very end it shows me beating off. I am up on a hill and I took a bunch of pills to commit suicide and then at the end it shows me beating off like I'm remembering the girl, jerking to her. But I was so wasted I couldn't get it hard, so, it was kinda of tragic.
CD: He won an award for that?
GROSSO: Yeah, he actually won an award for it and got an A. It was a college project called Play Time. It might even be on the interweb.
CD: What were the things that got you into skateboarding as a kid?
GROSSO: My mom got me into skateboarding as a kid. I've told that story before though.
Textbook front rock. Pala.
Fresh off of knee surgery, a red-eye drive to Vegas, and 118 degrees worth of desert misery, first backside Smith ever. '07.
CD: Is Dave Swift (theSKATEBOARDmag editor) really accurate when he writes the "Origins" feature?
GROSSO: (laughing) FUCK NO! I don't know if Swift is to blame actually. But he should be held responsible. I don't know. I love Swift I don't want to talk shit on Swift. Its kinda hard to sit there and say kids should know the history of stuff when even the old fuckers don't know the proper history. I've been getting schooled too, lately because some of the things I think are a certain way, then I find out they aren't. So it is all very humbling for all of us.
A day early, and a dollar long, signature claw-lien at Ramona.
Onion hop. Ramona.
CD: When I say Gazzari's what comes to mind?
GROSSO: (laughing) We played Gazzarri's with my little band called The Insultors, in high school. I drank 5 pints of Schnapps got naked, got this kid Jeff Epily's arm broken, started a riot and fought the bouncers with a push broom naked. And I got kicked out of the band the next day.
CD: If you were elected president what would your priorities be?
GROSSO: Fuck. That's pretty heavy. I guess you'd try to fix the economy. Maybe start producing things here again instead of shipping them overseas so that "made in the USA" would actually mean something. I'd probably want to legalize drugs. I'd socialize medicine. We definitely need to fix the school system, half of the kids don't even go to school any more. Home school or whatever it is, they go and they get their shit and then the turn it in at the end of the month. We're like 38th in the world in education and that is pretty pathetic. We're really a shell of what we once were maybe in the 40's or 50's. We're kind of coasting on that.
Mammoth on opening day, that's a 22-footer. Jeff avoids the goat.
Usually when you see a photo of a pro surrounded by kids, it's because the kids begged for it. In this case these kids heckled the shit out of us, and Jeff asked if he could get a photo with them. Good times.
CD: You talk a lot of smack about loads of skatepark designs. What would you make?
GROSSO: Sheesh... the pirhana tank definitely. I would make a snake run. Nobody has built a good snake run. Red built that one in Lincoln City OR and that is fucking awesome. It's one of the greatest things I have skated in the past 20 years. I'd definitely make a snake run. As far as pools go, I think lesser is more. I like simple things, I like wide open things. I do want to build a little backyard pool. There's a place for that too I guess. I would just make it escalating from a beginner area to expert terrain
CD: How did getting hitched change you?
GROSSO: Well, I gotta go to work everyday now. I don't get to be a fucking idiot like I used to be, otherwise she'll split. It mellowed me out. It taught me, or its been teaching me, that its not all about me. There's a we involved now and that's good for me.
CD: How long have you been a CD message board lurker?
GROSSO: Fuck I don't know, when did you guys do your Montclair get together?
CD: '03 or '04 maybe?
GROSSO: So probably '04 since your Montclair get together because I went out to that.
CD: Who did you think you hated but when you met them they were alright?
GROSSO: I'm a pretty closed-minded individual. I like to prejudge people because I'm a fucking freak. And I like to stick to my guns without actually doing any kind of investigation or whatever. So like I went on the Indy tour thing and there were a lot of street guys. All kinds of walks, like young, old, street, ah... whatever category you want to put them in. Like I met Kenny Anderson and I thought I would have absolutely nothing in common with Kenny Anderson. He's a Girl guy, he's a street dude, and he always seemed 'fresh' to me. It's not that I hated him, I just never even thought about him. The guy was the coolest and my favorite guy on tour. The guy ripped. He was super mellow and fun to be around. I've been learning that I kind of have to get rid of that prejudging, old man, stick to your guns, bullshit because I end up missing out.
Layback roll-out re-entry, Pala.
You'll believe a man can fly. Indy, Ramona.
CD: Who is the all time gnarliest skateboarder of all time in your opinion?
GROSSO: I don't know. There are categories of that. The obvious answer would be Tony Hawk probably, and people don't want to hear that. They can't associate him with gnarly, but he is pretty fucking gnarly! The other obvious answer is somebody like Duane Peters. He just comes with this kind of controlled chaos thing. I am a big fan of Lance Mountain. You know who I've seen recently, and this goes back to the question before, Sammy Baca. That kid is FUCKING GNARLY! That kid will huck himself down the worst shit with glass all over it and spikes coming out of it and not even care. So I'll say Sammy Baca.
CD: Aren't you glad none of these questions are about drugs and alcohol?
GROSSO: Yeah, that's a pretty played out topic.
CD: Why do magazines always seem to be more concerned with what you used to do (drugs etc.) then what you're doing now?
GROSSO: I think because skateboarding and skateboarders like the survivor stories.They like the Rocky theory and to some extent, for better or for worse, I got that fucking going. And for younger dudes who get to look up and see these older guys that have survived being complete and total idiots and they still skate and you go, fuck if they can still skate that means I can still skate when I am their age. At the end of the day that is what its about, its just about the act of rolling.
Making the Texans proud! A very Proper Don't Fucking Mess With Texas Plant
CD: How come nobody remembers that you rode for Variflex and were you forced or coerced into riding Connection Trucks?
GROSSO: I was both forced and coerced, but I was happy to do it because it was my first sponsor. The reason nobody remembers is because I was on Variflex for a really short period of time and because it was my first sponsor I wasn't that good yet and nobody cared. I was a nobody. Connection were fucking beautiful, they ruled. Variflex ruled. Anyone that says differently doesn't know what they're talking about.
CD: Do you think you have had an overwhelming number of sadplant photos because people think you're a sad person?
GROSSO: (laughing) Fuck... maybe, I don't know.
CD: First tattoo, worst tattoo?
GROSSO: My first tattoo, I was doing a lot of speed in the 90's and I got an alien insignia because I thought the aliens were coming. the X Files and meth didn't really match up back then. I got that on my shoulder. The worst tattoo I have seen? My friend Ronnie Spector has bald spots. He's got a receding hairline. He got spider webs tattooed in the bald spots and thats pretty brutal. I've got some pretty bad ones myself though.
CD: What's the last tattoo that you got?
GROSSO: The last tattoo I got was this flying pig.
CD: When did you get that?
GROSSO: I got that on the Indy Tour in Houston.
CD: Who is your favorite dead rock star?
GROSSO: I'm a big fan of Elliot smith. He's dead. Joe Strummer is also dead. He was fucking rad. Those two come off the top of my head.
This could be called a "Sean Penn's Ex", but then it sort of sounds like Sean Penn Sex. That's no good. Madonna, Ramona.
CD: How could you have ever thought that wearing tie-dye was a good idea?
GROSSO: Garcia is dead, Garcia was rad. Jerry Garcia...
CD: No. How could you have ever thought that wearing tie-dye was a good idea?
GROSSO: I just said Jerry Garcia is dead. Well... it was the 80's man, give me a fucking break. Lets see how you survived the 80's. You were pretty stupid too if you were around. I was taking a lot of acid, it seemed like a good time at the time.
CD: Why is a skateboarding series (World Cup) named after a soccer tournament? Does that affect how we all should perceive it?
GROSSO: Fuck the World Cup! I think the World Cup is a big part of the problem as far as competitive skateboarding goes. I like Danielle and Don Bostick immensely as people and I think they are great. But they have been in the game a super long time so they are kind of set in their ways. Maybe a tad bit burned out by the whole thing. Fighting the good fight for so many years. The events, they represent that. People are more interested in getting paid to announce or judge or to work the fence then putting on an actual good event. At the end of the day its a contest, and all contests are pretty gay but there's always ways to make them more interesting and more fun.
CD: We're just coming off the Rumble in Ramona, what did you think of that?
GROSSO: I thought that was great for what they were trying to do. Darren had a neat little idea and he got to execute it and he got a ramp out of it at the end of the day. Everyone had a good time. There was no fucking bad vibes, there was no fights. Everybody drank and smoked weed, and there was still no bad vibes. It was reminiscent of an old 80's affair where there was actually unity involved. Rather then going to GvR. You go to GvR and you're some street dude that doesn't even want to be there, doesn't even want to skate, and they give you a thousand bucks. Lester goes and enters Masters and practices for 2 weeks and if he gets first or second he might get a thousand bucks. It's a little fucking lopsided. Now I know street rules the world and everything, but why even do it. Etnies should be ashamed of themselves, World Cup bites, and everybody's so busy patting themselves on the back because they put on this great event. Their event sucks. But you don't even know that because its not even about the event, its about the fact that you said you had an event. That's why Steve Van Doren is so good for setting up the Protec thing. It was different and it was great the first year or two. Now the shininess has worn off of it a little bit. Now its time to try something else. The first year Vans went off to Hawaii it was a great event. Everybody had a blast. There's ways to think about it and execute it where the participants have fun, some people make some money. I mean it says Bank of the West on the bottom of the Soul Bowl and what is first place? A fucking grand? You know its bank of the West and its two grand. I can guarantee you, fucking dildo dagger boy Duncan was getting paid at least a grand to talk about that stupid movie. I love Duncan. I am talking shit on him but I love Duncan. I've known Duncan forever. He deserves to get that paid that kind of money. but when the announcer or the judge is getting paid more money then the guy who is putting his fucking neck on the line??? I don't know who's fault that is. Maybe I'm incorrect and putting that on World Cup or the people that try to put these events on, but there is something wrong in that. Something tragically wrong in that. I for one, don't want to go to suffer camp at etnies to make 200 bucks. Its not a good time. Not to mention you get run into by fucking Glen Charnowski and get put off my skateboard for 6 months. For the opportunity to make a thousand bucks?! I'd rather light a thousand dollars on fire and dance around it.
Somebody's got to clean up this mess.
Big flat wall flapper a few years back.
CD: What do you think of the way they do these jam formats now?
GROSSO: I think the have traded in good skateboarding for excitement level. They'll sit there and go 'well the crowd likes it', you got Rune Glifberg, Omar Hassan, and Bucky Lasek all in the bowl at once. They are all looking out for each other. Now Rune is going to survive it and probably win that 3 way match up. He's going to do 2 back smiths, 3 back tail slides, a couple of 50-50's and maybe one banger trick. That'll be his run. Everyone will go 'it was so exciting and so rad', well if you would have taken Bucky and Omar out of the bowl and let Rune ride the bowl alone you would have seen lines, you would have seen insane tricks, you would have seen fucking some of the highest level of skateboarding 2008 has to offer. But instead you see him doing back tail, back tail, 50-50, look up, go around a corner, back smith, frontside grind, carve under Omar. It's not that exciting. You know when its spontaneous and every once in a while, but now they lean on it so hard. When the older guys have sat down and said we don't want to do that any more because we're old, and I don't want to end Lance Mountains skating career and I don't want to end Lesters career by running into him. I'm 222 pounds you know. You put 10,000 dollars on the line for something, or a thousand dollars on the line, and people are going to come out and because nobody want to embarrass themselves, at the end of the day its about putting on a show for anybody that had the fortitude to show up and watch, we all want to put on a good show, and we all want to skate well for our peers and for the fans/spectators or whatever. I don't want to run into Lester, fold his knee, and then he can never skate again. Or he has to go through a year and a half of rehab so that Duncan can say 'Daggers for Life, Texas Deathmatch, criss cross craziness'. You know what, all you people that don't ride skateboards fucking blow me. Get in there and go 30 miles an hour straight at Ben Schroeder for fucking 200 dollars. Suck it!
CD: Some one is going to have a career ender. It's coming and then what?
GROSSO: Then they laugh about it. We got paid! We got paid, We don't even step on our skateboards. We got paid. Its not even about making the event good, its about getting through the event so you can get onto to the next one. Oh we got Bank of the West to sponsor it, Great! where's the money? Oh I know where it is you guys took it all. Your fees, your 15 grand to work the gate or whatever the fuck you get paid. I don't know. I just think it goes back to some of these people have been doing this for so long its just second nature to them. they don't really put in that much. I am sorry Don, I am sorry Danielle, I love you, you guys are fantastic. It's not about you. It's about that somebody should sit down and think about this stuff a little more and go hey we've got this tremendous opportunity. All this cement and all these young kids coming up and people want to see it again. They didn't for a long time. Lets show them the very best we can instead of just half ass it so we can fucking cash a check. So we can pay a mortgage on our house. Lets not make it about a fucking mortgage, lets make it about how is the skating that day. You know the skating at Ramona was week or whatever, because it was a bunch of guys trying to learn how to skate vert again everybody had a blast. And that translated.
CD:Yeah, everybody had a blast. Any Closing comments:
GROSSO: Worm, you rule!
Desert Dog Bowl '06 maybe... For not giving a shit about it, Jeff took down almost everybody with ease. Must be the 501 shants or something.
Parting shot, Indy fastplant, Fontuckee.
Thursday 16th 2009f April 2009 14:07 Print this Page
